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Wally's World

[First, they’re in a race car. It’s loud, They’re yelling through microphones most of the time. Also, Wally makes a joke about “Elliot Sadler” in the first part. Elliot Sadler is a race car driver, so Wally’s not just an idiot, he’s trying to be funny.]

Announcer: Time for “Wally’s World” driven by State Farm. We’ve seen plenty of chaos and mayhem on the racetrack the last couple of weeks, but the speeds at this Atlanta racetrack are so fast, Wally says today there better be…Law and Order.

[Wally’s World theme song…I’ll spare you.]

[Chris and Wally are driving around the track.]

Wally: Welcome to Wally’s World. My special guest this week, Chris Meloni! Welcome aboard, buddy!

Chris: Hey, thanks for having!

Wally: Hey, now on the show you play Detective Elliot Sadler?

Chris: Stabler.

Wally: Oh, Stabler.

Chris: Yeah.

Wally Okay.

Chris: So you just keep it (the car) nice and stable here.

Wally: Have you ever been around Atlanta before?

Chris: Not this Atlanta, baby! Hoohoo!

Wally: This place is about the scariest place a race car driver can drive.

Chris: When are you gonna find that accelerator?

Wally: Right here.

[Wally zooms up close to the wall]

Chris: Woooohoohoo. Wow! Ohhhh, baby!

Wally: As a detective I’m sure you know how to stop crime. Las week we had a driver threaten to strangle another competitor.

[Clip of some guy saying he wants to strangle…some other guy]

Wally: What would you do about that?

Chris: First I’d use all my driver’s skills to track him down.

[Clip from “Ripped” of Stabler beating a guy up]

Chris: Then I’d pull him over and I’d handcuff him.

[More clips of the “Ripped” ass beating]

Chris: How close to that wall are you getting?

Wally: About as close as I can without hitting it…Do you want me to hit it once?

Chris: No, I have to go to work tomorrow. Wow.

Wally: I always knew a detective would stop by Wally’s World, just not as a guest. Now, Chris I would really like to be on your show, and I’ll be a criminal, I’d just really like a shot at it.

Chris: Well, I’ll tell you what. I won’t let you be a criminal, but I’ll let you be a victim.

Wally: I’ve been a victim all my life!